Why do things play out like this?

Why is it the way things have to go?

Why is this life?

How things go,

How things are,

How the die roll,

Just gone,

In the sea of infinity,

The bother and strife.

Endless times I push away,

Endless times I bother.

Endless times I fall,

I fail.

In this sea of why,

The trees stand,

The wind blows,

The cold shivers.

All in disrepair.

World thrown into flux.

Don’t know.

Don’t be,

Don’t know,

Don’t worry,

Don’t be.

The shadows move,

The shadows be.

The small light far off and flickering and waiting to fade.

Cast it off,

Cast it out.

Be it out.

Be it gone.

Be it now.

Let it go.

Don’t want care,

Don’t want worry.

Go and cast off,

Thrown out,

Thrown away

To the sharks

To the depths.

Want out of my mind

To fight off my all.

The fakeness

All those feelings.

All taken and poisoned by words,

The feeling hurts

Can’t see what to do,

Where to go


That empty road.

Heavy breathing and hurt.


Why the panic

Why afraid

The light fades and the trees wither.

All out and empty left.

Thrown to disarray.

Interest to the being of everything.

Anger, pain and hurt is all to greet me.


Drunken state of panic,

The destruction I cause.

All there and gone at the same time.

Anger there to comfort,

Also to hurt

The endless walk.

The people,

Nameless faces as I walk..

That long, wide, lonely empty road

Criticised and hurt at every turn.

For being me.

For how I am. No one to turn to.

They don’t understand.

No one does.

They hurt and I do.

Thoughts to and fro and don’t know when they’ll stop.

All thoughts at the same time, with no peace in my mind,

No peace to find.

Afraid to write on my own blog.

In my own safe space.

My own place.

Where I can express, I can be,

I can escape from my mind

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