Clawed Back To the Depths

Clawed back to the depths,
The horrid darkness.
From managing to escape.
The past trying to claim and capture.

To wrap around my neck,
Throw me out,
Stamp out my soul.
If any is left.

Being clawed back to the depths.
Recovery cut short.
Loss, recovery, sadistic brutality.

The mind thrashing,
Against the inside of my brain.
The night sky around,
No sleep to take hold.
Not such a peaceful end to this torture.

Being clawed back to the depths,
The horror and thrashing calmed.
By time, friends, realisation.

To claw myself out,
Out from the darkest depths.
One setback,
Before an onward journey forward.


Feeling. Not better. But. Don’t know. Can’t get to sleep as it’s hurting. Thinking is hurting. But a bit better writing this, close friends by my side, help I don’t deserve, people I’d give my life for in a heartbreat. People I care more than anyone.

Let Adrift

Let adrift.
All the thoughts.
The pain.
All to be ended.
To save myself from further pain.

Off walking into the dark.
Let adrift.
Got adrift.

Erasing.
Purging.
Let adrift.
Setting off.

Purging the pain.
Off.
Let adrift,
To try.
To live.


Feeling really sad right now. Missing out. Hurting. Just no words. Worse I’ve felt in quite a while. Tried watching movies to keep my mood up. Not working. All to do now is go to sleep, listen to music and hope the day ends quickly.

The poem, terrible. Don’t even feel like writing, thinking.

Even sleep. Seems unbearable. Want to drink, fall asleep. Forget. Leave the day behind.