But Not

But not.
Living in those smallest moments,
Loving the life.
So many worries yet to come.

But while,
In this moment.
The fade.
Feelings, introspective,
Of it all.

Of all this.
Of these times.
Feelings, an unending puzzle.
Questions left in the mind.

Of all there is,
Peace and not.
Walking down this road.

Through it all,
The calling,
Into time it all flows.

Okay.
But not.
Unsure,
But not.

Wondering, wandering in this time,
But not.


Had an amazing day, saw friends I haven’t in months, some as far back as Christmas. Was really good. After we left, felt a bit sad.

Lots of things, the “post-good-time” sadness I usually get. Thinking of the future, of being alone generally, don’t talk to family much, friends leaving, I’m leaving home. Sad I’ve changed a lot, most is good, but worried about some stuff changing negatively, but maybe, probably just me thinking.

Thinking of the past, lots of changes, lots of growth, but feeling a little alone, lost, happy yet also sad, and lots more.

Definitely was a good day and don’t want to seem ungrateful for this amazing time, but yeah. Lots of introspective thinking.

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