I Once Had Hope

I once had hope,
So much,
Looking for,
In the waiting and ready to accept.

But it was once upon a time.
The revelations show themselves.
Their dark truth.
Where the mind’s light cannot prevail.

And here I am,
A body and that’s all.
Breathing and living,
Being and existing.
Without hope or happiness.

As I try, I try.
To fight, to find.
To construct my own hope,
Yet to no avail.
There is none.

Yet I keep fighting,
Keep trying.

Is this the overthinking?
Or realising the impossible, this is my goal.
Mind ticking over.
Body giving in.

Broken.
In mind, body and spirit.
Giving up.
As I try, but all is lost.

All is lost.
All is lost.
And I,
Am lost with it

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