Darkest of Paths

Darkest of paths,
Mind brought to breaking.
Deepseated poison in my veins.

The panic hits.
Breathing and thinking raging, racing.
Heart hurting.
Mind racing across all thoughts.
Pain, deep pain.
Within me, it devastates.

Needing to escape.
Journeying out from my house, looking for an escape.
From the panic,
The dread.
All of a sudden this panic set in.
2am and its all set upon me.

Clamouring outside,
Waiting, looking for,
I do not know.
Needing fresh air,
Claustrophobic in the outside breeze.

My biggest fear,
A welcome relief if it would rid me of the pain.
Make a deal with the devil to lessen this feeling.

Never escaping this,
The panic,
My sleepless soul,
Looking for a way.

And out I’ve gone.

The walk, sea-breeze, never helping to calm my panicked mind.

Only left,
Hoping it will subside.

Today’s been a really terrible day. Everything. Everything. Panicking at many many moments. Everything, when your chest seizes up, your mind is screaming. Your heart is pounding that it hurts and leaves you breathless. Heart pounding all the time. Everything just hurts. And the mind just keeps going. Keeps giving me sensory information when I just want it to stop. To give me some respite. I need a break.

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