As Caring Hurt

As caring hurts,
Trying to kill the care,
Put it down,
Stub it out.
To try.
To rip it out.

To forget all care,
Care for the world,
To be forgotten in the cold.
To be left to die.

As the caring hurts,
Memories stay,
As all forget.
Always remembering all the moments.

No matter the time passing,
Remembered in time.
As the pictures stay,
In the mind.

Never wanting to rip them out,
Never wanting to forget,
Keeping them…

Wrote this poem before work this morning, was going to finish it after but so much happened. So much shit, panicking, over lots of small things brought all to boiling.

So this is left, a piece unfinished.

Sea’s Night Shine

The sea’s night shine,
Pondering my past mistakes,
Alone watching the sea light up from the moonlight.

Pondering what I’ve said.
Alone and thinking,
Amongst the moonlight’s shine.
The world captured by it all.
How it went, it goes past now.

Life goes past,
But the mind’s always there.
Left wondering,
Of a world gone past.

In place,
In the world gone dark.
Amidst the sea’s night shine.

As the world starts.
Watching life, pass,
In the making.
Always observing,

In the moment but always aside.

Sat on the beach in the dark, as usual, thinking, thinking about seeing. Then some people invited me over to a fire one of them started and hung out with a few total strangers with everyone being strangers to everyone else. Stayed quite a while, then left and back to thinking.

Feeling, wondering when the pain will stop. Talking to friends, I talked to some friends tonight and that’s nice, for the immediate time and then saddened again. Saddened, thinking, wanting the pain to stop.