Lost In Feeling

Lost in feeling,
Many paths, colours, times.
Trials made and to be,
Marks shown, left and made.
A place, time, memory or phrase,
Taking back to the tally,
Left upon my body,
My mind.

Having forgotten, or just put aside,
Memory floods back,
A reminder.
Oh how,
What it takes.
The time.

Feeling, being, living.
In the face of being.

Going on,
When the past only piles on,
Memories scars,
Left to not feel,
To avoid feeling.
To cut away emotion,
Killing the feeling inside,
A detachment from life,
From being.

A life that is not living, As the only way to even get close,
To living.

Beig without feeling,
Always ignoring what my mind says so.

Those moments, lost in feeling. I’m highly empathetic, went on a photography trip today alone, on the bus I nearly started crying, one of those things I find, when you imagine a scenario, and feel as if it occurred, so much. It’s interesting and weird. I didn’t cry, taking myself out of feeling again.

But I like this, it allows empathy and feeling for everyone, any scenario, any side, even if I don’t agree, it allows empathy.

Even after this photography trip, which took all day, thinking of a friend, a few friends, good friends. I can’t help but remember. Each time I was hurt, each thing said, time, it all, like individual scars on my body, ones I can count, recall, remember, and feel.

I’ve had a really good day, but unfortunately can feel, can’t stop feeling and this always hurts. A really good friend messaged me and we got chatting about lots of deep stuff, we’re more similar than I thought. But still.