Deteriorating World

Left watching,
The world’s slow deterioration,
A crumbling of the fabric of everything.
A slow death,
A coming end.

As it moves towards conclusion.
A end coming,
Breaking apart before conclude.
Before a finality.
All to do but watch, with sadness,
Gazing upon, a crushing end.
As it all falls apart,
I stand watching,
Waiting,
Waiting for a breaking point,
Watching for the rupture.
Sadness grips me,
As it all slips away.
All pushed apart,
All crushing under the weight of it all.

Loss just consumes me,
With no way out,
No other way out.
Watching the world like a ghost.
Unsure about anything.
It all,
Breaking upon the weight of it all.

I can’t,
Standing here but can’t,
Do nought but watch it all,
Fall apart,
Crushed.

Flogging myself along a path,
Trying not to fall further and further behind.
But it tires me,
Trying to move along,
In the dark,
Without any direction or light.
I am stuck.
Am lost.

With nothing that can be done,
During this deteriorating world.


Sad, same stuff as I was writing about last night, even the one thing that can give me hope or happiness I have to see, have to see it as a lie or an illusion. Leaving me just giving up.

Curse my Autism to hell, leaving me in pain. Constant pain.

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