Anticipation

The anticipation,
Excitement, waiting on that night.
To be there,
Meet, chat an care.
All that once upon a memory.

Anticipation for the next.
Emotions swelling,
Happiness raring.

Wanting,
Such a feeling of anticipation.
Making the memory bright,
One upon a smile,
Just thinking,
Thinking back to that time before.
So long ago,
Yet remembered as yesterday.

Life singing its song.
The world turning with joy and anticipation.
The sun rises,
The waiting for that bright moment,
To dispel the darkest night.

To dispel the darkest night,
Happy, in anticipation.

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Time to be Forgotten

A time to be forgotten,
A time long, since it’s passed.
A time that’s stayed with me,
Kept me,
Held me,
Gave me hope.

A time, a renewal, a start and bright light.
Ending, abruptly, yet also calmly.
Ended, with great emotional loss.
Time passed, anticipation for,
Time passed, wanting, hoping and keeping hope.
Keeping those lessons learnt,
Keeping those feelings,
The hope for what’s next,
Happiness for what I’ve got,
The Kindness for all hurt.
The ability to move on, to live on.

This time long ended,
I cannot ignore the echoes of my own voice,
In a chasm of the dark.

This time.
Long since ended,
I convinced myself, hoped,
It was there still,
Or it would be.

Yet, I have come to learn that no.
I’ve been living a lie.
A happy one, perhaps.
But every lie needs an end.
Now I stand here.
Thinking of all having gone past.
All being lost.

Having lost that direction,
I thought I once had.

A time, once forgotten.


Thinking. A person contacted me. One I haven’t heard from in a while. Got me thinking. Got me thinking of the end. How it was an amazing time, got me out of somewhere so lost. Got me recovered. But, then just ended like it never happened. An end. It’s difficult. Thinking. Remembering it has kept me alive since, kept me happy, even despite times of sadness. But with this, I am just reminded of how, maybe it is… a time to be forgotten.

Worth the Pain?

Is it worth the pain?
To get that happiness and the high.
Missing it,
In those smallest moments,
Worth the wait.

To be dragged along.
Shown the way,
Before the throw-away.
Used and led,
My mistake.
My greatest time.
Is it worth the pain.
To get this high.

Sitting,
Hoping for the best.
Your best.
Everything good to go your way.
As I wonder.
Is it worth the pain?
For those best moments.
Those little times.

Here I sit.
Wondering into the night.

Remembering all those times,
Those good times,
And the bad.
Wondering to myself.

It’s worth it.
To see you smile.
To see you happy.
A pain that only comes,
Wanting to see you again.
Anticipation,
For the next good time to come.
It’s worth the pain.
The pain of the wait.
To see your smile.


I am good,

I know I mention pain,

Got it from Taylor Swift’s “Blank Space”

It’s the wait. For something good again to come, a good pain, though pain isn’t the word. The anticipation for another sweet moment.

Anticipation

Anticipation for the change,

Unsure,

Nothing known,

Everything stuck in a cloud of uncertainty.

Wonder, chance, amazement.

Excitement for what may be,

Worry for the ending, the cessation.

The continuation.

The wonderment

Waiting, wondering, watching…

With anticipation.