Promise You

Promise you,
Care to stay,
No matter my troubles I face,
I will make it through,
To bolster myself against the demons of my past.

I promise you,
Your past,
You,
All of you,
I’m there for.

To stand by you,
In the dark, cold or rain.
To be there,
To see you smile,
That next time.

Having my own demons to face.
My own to beat.
My triumph to keep.
My promise to you, and to me.

A kindness,
Promised to you.
My care,
Promised to you.
One I’ll keep.

My promise to you.
One I’ll keep.

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Wasted

Wasted, through my care.
Unrequited,
My care, empty yet felt,
Meaningful in its truth.
But lost all the same.

My feelings wasted,
My feelings spent.
Oh how I cared,
Oh how I care.

Afraid to be hurt again.
Even though I care.

Sad, that how I feel,
All of me,
Wasted.
Sad to see my feelings,
Splayed out across the wall,
The wall of my mind.
A hurtful reminder,
Wasted.

A sadness comes over me,
Seeing you,
Wanting to help you,
Wanting you happy.

But in the end.
All my feelings.
Wasted.


I know it’s a sad poem, I’m not sad, happy, had a good day and tried so hard to help a really good friend. Someone I care about with the whole world.

It’s just a moment, painful, hurtful, overthinking. It will pass, it always does. But the feelings, the care, doesn’t.

But it’s okay, I care. And it’s wasted. I’m wasted.

Heartbroken to See You Cry.

Here I stand,
Watching you cry,
Trying to do what I can,
To reassure.

To be there for you.
The time of doubt,
Pain,
Worry.

A place of darkness.
Not wanting to leave you face it alone.
Not that you can’t take it,
But better not to, alone.

Heartbreak, at seeing one I care about the most.
Lost, sad and hurt.
The place.
Having been lost before,
I can relate.
Having myself,
Seen an end,
A final,
A end.

Not wanting to leave you to the claim of the dark.

To stand,
Even by your side.
Even just to be there in silence.
So you weren’t alone.
So you had company, care.

I, heartbroken, to see you hurt.
But yet determined.
To do anything I can.
To do anything I can.

Even to be there.
So you wouldn’t have to face the darkness alone.

I’d conquer my demons,
Just so I could stand with you to face yours.


Another storyesque, taken some artistic liberties, emotional hyperbole, linking with my past, feelings and thoughts, my being and essence.

That end stanza. One of my favourite lines/quotes I have made in the lifespan of this blog:

“I would face my demons, just to help you face yours”
– ‘Nice’Guy

This post reminds me of another poem I wrote a while ago, still mean every word, the feeling is still there, even though so much has happened in between; Anything For You, which is what I was going to name this poem, but I recognised I thought I used the name before. Read the poem and found out it’s all still true. Surprisingly. But all still true.

Anger for a Lie

The lies you shared,
Refusing me the dignity of being,
Leaving me in torture,
Under your foot.
Broken and controlled.

Only others showed me your lies,
Gave me decency on your behalf when you refused.
Showed me basic human respect when you denied me.

Thrown off my chains,
Tearing my self out,
Out of the hurtful lies,
The bad situation.
The wrecked mind I had to piece back.

You, the orchestrator of my demons’ symphony.


Thinking of the past, how someone treated me, something I tried to forget. But stuff is happening like the same as before.

Finished writing later, not feeling so bad, a walk home, time to think, space, some good news and errands has put me in a better mood.

Cutting Myself Off

Cutting myself off,
Misunderstood, left in the unknown,
Unable to help those I care about.
Left out of the picture.

Patterns repeat,
Pain comes again.
Being warned away,
But not taking heed.
Needing to cut off.
To save myself.
Needing to cut off,
To protect, to help, to live.

I do not want to,
Cut away the feeling.
But it may save me,
By killing a major part.

A decision of me,
Decision of mine.
One I do not want.
Cannot take.

Funny,
How some things change.
How most others stay the same.


Feeling quite sad, sad I cannot help, that they do not know. The latter is for the best, but brings me great pain.

Considering legitimately, now, the first time in a long time. To cut myself off.

They have a friend, do not need me. I’m only the help for work, company or motivation.

I can do all those things for myself, but not worth doing it for another, if it only brings pain. But that’s the hard part.

It doesn’t only bring pain, but brings something so worth it, the feeling, that it makes the pain worth it.

I know this feeling, may be overthinking. But even then, one truth I know, my overthinking, is usually right, is the truth, but one I do not want to come to terms with. I need to. I have to.

Seems like it’s decision time for me. One I will make tonight, one way, or another.

Greatest of Days, Sweetest of Nights

The greatest of days, sweetest of nights.
Blissful moments,
Sweet sunrises,
Blissful nights.
Peaceful minds,
At rest. Sweet and happy.

Those moments,
Rare to come by.
Perfect in acuality.
The sweetest reality.

Perfect in being,
Demons drifting,
Fading away.
As they never were.

A moment,
A feeling,
To be grasped in reality,
Held in memory.
Cherished in the past,
Through a bright future to come.

“Come with, the future’s bright”.
The truth,
Not often seen.

Golden when found.
Precious, calling into the darkness of the past.
Scaring the darkness away.

Forcing my way into the light.

The happiness to be found,
Life to be held,
Heart felt,
Throughout…
Those greatest of days, sweetest of nights.

One Worth It

One worth it,
Waiting, one worth the wait,
Worth my care,
My love.

Out there,
To be revealed,
When I least expect.
In those smallest of moments.

One, to care for,
In all their times of need.
Willing to let me in.
One to rely on,
Who knows,
They can rely on me.

To face their demons.
My hand in theirs,
The whole way.
To face mine,
With them,
By my side.

To conquer the darkness,
Together.
And walk out stronger, victorious.

Worth the wait.
To find the diamond.
A diamond in the rough.

Beauty in an unexpected place,
An unexpected moment.
A person flawed,
But beautiful all the same.


Thinking about love,care and what it means to me to share yourself with someone who wants to do the same. Such beauty can be found, in such unexpected places. Perfect in their “imperfections”. A subjective beauty, subjective perfection all the same.

Anything For You

Anything for you,

Bracing my demons,
To stand beside you,
As you face yours.

Anything for you.
Even from afar.
Crushing my soul.
Making it gold.

The confused feeling.
The rampant thoughts.
The pain you leave me.
To no fault of your own.

Crushing my soul under foot.
To stop the feeling.
Or so I try.
Until you revive it,
Despite my best of efforts.

Bringing me back.

Anything for you.
Even through the pain.
I’ll rise.
Stronger.

Anything for you.
No matter what people say.

Worth all the pain in the world.
Just to see you smile.
That kindly smile,
The cute laugh.
The puppy-eyes that make me melt inside.

Thoughts I’m told to leave behind.
Feelings keeping hold.

Care still there.
Anything for you.

How To Break From – Part 2: The Return

A path left open,
Another shines the light.
To give you reason.
To climb out of the darkest depths there are.

Not to give you life,
To give you strength,
To go grab it for yourself.

Shining on high.

With their own demons.
But able to shed light.
To pull another,
From their darkest depths.
To make a return.

A return to life,
A return to existence.

In the mere little moments.
A world in my eyes.
For giving me the smallest moment,
Is a break from…
The world of darkness.

The Angel of my eyes.
For giving me a chance,
For giving me.
Strength to make my return.

 


A poem, I wrote thinking of you, of how you helped me, more than you know, more than you’ll ever know.

I found my strength,
As you opened a hand out for me.
With a mere smile, a ‘hello’.
A kindness, I remember with all my heart.

Written 30/Oct/2017 1:50pm UTC – Unsure when I’ll publish this.